narinasedai

First Live Journal Post In Very Long Time.

Sat, 03 Oct 2009 21:01:25 GMT

So i am getting sick. :( I have the sniffles and the sneezes. Also my head is congested. It sucks. It also makes my bipolar worse because my head feels funny on top of the bipolar part. Yes it is sometimes grueling.

I feel different. At first I thought I was confused but then I realized there's nothing to be confused about. Maybe I just feel different because i'm sick.

Not much is going on besides homework. I start homework every day after three. I go to the coffee shop to do work. I'm usually on msn pretty much every day most of the day. Just sometimes I'm busy doing homework and don't talk much.

I'm enjoying my class a lot. I like the class on InDesign the best because I enjoy my homework the most. I also enjoy the other classes i'm taking. I like doing the English essays. And I like going to Interior Design class.

My brother now goes to UCSB. I like when he comes home every so often and visits us. He's doing well. Enjoying his classes and making friends.

I miss him but I get over it especially since this arrangement means more time with my mom. Though not much more because she works all the time. Basically it means meal times and when she drives me places.

I do miss him a good deal though sometimes.

er

Wed, 03 Jun 2009 20:18:25 GMT

actually i'd rather stay in school.....

plans forming

Wed, 03 Jun 2009 05:16:14 GMT

so I have been forming plans.

I plan to move into the program Sanctuary (for people with illnesses like me) even though it costs enormous amounts. 75 thousand a month.

Now my dad says i should take a year or something off of school if i'm going to do that. I think i'm going to say I will take a year off if you guys pay for it!

Then during the year I will visit my grandparents in washington and then by next summer I will move to washington.

This all may seem fluffy but it's actually very plausible in my current position.

pros: Sanctuary is supposed to be a life changing experience for someone like me. It is also in spectacular down town santa barbara. Washington is absolutely gorgeous and my grandparents live there if i need support, so does my aunt. I will get my independence!

cons: Sanctuary is super expensive. A move to washington might be a hard thing to convince the parents of.

Basically there are more pros then cons. I think it's a good idea.

End of the year/planning.

Mon, 18 May 2009 23:24:56 GMT

Wooohoo. I passed freshmen year. I officially congratulate myself. And i'm very proud to announce that I will be moving on in College and life.

This year was great. The end of the year definitely was. I entered showcase (an art competition that I will find out the results around the 21st) and I passed both my finals. During the year I worked my ass off and it all paid off. I loved the digital projects I did in both classes. I also enjoyed meeting new and interesting people. And I became friends with some of them. Some of them were asseholes and still are. A couple of them I had crushes on and one even liked me back but he is traveling all summer and it wasn't going to work out. *is sad* Well fortunately i will meet hot Italian chaps in Italy.

Another note, I plan on finding an apartment before I travel and move in after I come back.

LOA and LOA reason...

Sun, 03 May 2009 13:52:00 GMT

I'm going on LOA probably tomorrow from the White Tower (DM). I'm not sure for how long. It is Indefinite. I need to focus on end of the year exams and my end of the year portfolio. I need to pass otherwise i'm not aloud to move out like I want to. I'm also traveling in June and am very excited. Basically I need to focus on other things besides The White Tower. I will be bach!

AND any Red can reach me while i'm on LOA: my msn, lemondewdrop@hotmail.com. Please tell me who you are when you add me if you're not already added!

- Narina

Quirks and Random Things

Thu, 05 Mar 2009 07:06:19 GMT

I have come to realize that a life without romance is not necessarily a bad thing. I find that my life without romance is much much less complicated than a life with romance. Of course if I did take the time to learn about romance and become familiar with it I might not need to worry about how complicated or uncomplicated a life without romance is. At the moment I do not have time to read romance novels to boot with the school work i'm being assigned along with other books I have left on my bookshelf waiting to be read for the first time! However I may ask my friend Kayla, who read a lot of romance novels in HS, for a suggestion on which romance books to start on in case I ever feel the need.

I tend to find audiobooks very useful. Basically I can read while I do hw on the computer using photoshop or any other digital software. Reading in this case meaning listening to the audiobook. The good thing about audiobooks is they are a fair amount cheaper than regular books.

I have become a huge fan of instant watch on netflix.com. The way to do it is you find a movie that you like (it can be either instant watch or not) and then you click on the button that says it will show you more movies like it. Thats how I navigate throughout the site. I usually watch an instant watch on netflix everynight. It helps me fall asleep.

I have developed a system. I go on facebook once every two weeks. That way I get time to think about what i'm going to write and according to my therapist, being on facebook isn't all that healthy. I go on fanstory various amounts of time each week. However I give myself time to think about how i'm going to reply to the reviews and how i'm going to fix up my piece of writing thats being reviewed.

I usually have to drink coffee in the morning to be able to stay awake because my medication puts you to sleep. I actually like coffee. I'm very glad there is a coffee shop right by my house.

I tend to do homework at the coffee shop or either one of the libraries. Or at home.

I like to play computer games to get my mind off things. I recently got a game for my mac and I've played it some. Its fun!

DM News
I am now the Red Ajah Reporter. I do the newsletter. I'm very excited! :)

School Starts Tomorrow!

Sun, 25 Jan 2009 19:42:20 GMT

I realized I have been trying to be more agreeable then I am. One friend says she is definitely not excited about school. So I try and agree with her. Another friend says she's really excited about school. So I try and agree with her. Of course we've now run into a problem. I can't possibly be down in the dumps about school and really really excited about school at the same time! I decided that instead of being agreeable I would go with what I felt. And first I couldn't de cide but then I did once I found my class.

Then I felt that I was excited about school!

Well we will have to see what happens on Monday.

I almost lost a friend today.

Fri, 16 Jan 2009 03:42:16 GMT

Right now I feel like someone should tar, feather me, and leave me somewhere in a ditch to rot. I feel like someone should call me names and damn me as a heathen. Thankfully this has not happened. And I am very grateful to my other friends for being very supportive of me.

What about my rep? Who cares it was probably like that anyways right? ;)

Writers Block

Fri, 09 Jan 2009 20:32:47 GMT

For the past month I have discovered the site that has taken up most of the time. It is called Fanstory. Up until now I have been able to enter the contests and writing prompts on that site. You enter those prompts and contests using member dollars that you earn from reviewing members writing. Now at the beginning of January and some of December I have developed writers block.

My writers block acts in strange ways. I can write things like livejournals and blogs (though i have a hard time) but I cannot write a single story or poem. I can also think of a story to write but I cannot go through with writing it.

I have neglected my blog on the SFnews site. I plan to write that blog today.

School starts on January 26th and i'm very excited. I'm taking Digital Imaging1 and Media Design. Media Design is online and the time is TBA.

I'm only on campus two days of the week. Mondays and Wednesdays for Digital Imaging1. Then I'm going to try and get a job at the library or the counceling office. Hopefully the dsps counciling office.

I was testing out a new medication called abilify. However that does not seem to be working at all and i'm going back on zyprexia. I'm already improving.

I feel like I am much more ready to got to college than I was at the beginning of the last semester. More mentally prepared.

I have decided that I need to get more political books instead of political magazines. Perhaps I should go to borders.com.....

Parents out of town and the Election.

Wed, 05 Nov 2008 20:35:09 GMT

And i'm trying to think of fun things for me to do as i'm not in school this semester. Meaning I have a lot of free time. At the moment going out to dinner with family seems to be the thing. I mean the other side of the family. My dad specifically. He's already taken us out to dinner once this week. He's going to take me too my favorite restaurant Chillies this evening. I was going to go by myself but he wanted to take me and Andrew out to dinner. Andrew has a cross country dinner party this evening so its just me and my dad. Going out to dinner is funner when someone is there with you so I invited my dad along to Chilies. He wasn't sure at first about the food but when I told him they have Mexican food there he seemed to change his mind. The only problem then was the timescale. He has a dentist appointment at five and I had planned for 6:00. So I said we could change the time and he decided that he would show up between six and six thirty.

Last night I went to Andrew's friend's house. Well they are really a family friend. Dairine picked me up from the house and took me there. Andrew couldn't drive me, he still has about a year before he can drive anyone under 21. So he could drive my sister and not me. *shrug* I get by anyways. Andrew also had a guitar lesson so he couldn't drive me anyways. He was meeting me there. He was there when I got there and he and Alex were doing homework.

The rest of the time we all socialized and watched the election.

I was shocked and pleased that Obama won the election.

I was shocked because the passed two elections were so bad I was almost expecting something bad to happen. I was pleased because I had voted for Obama. I had also sent out doorhangers for him through the democratic campaign here in California. And so many people helped make this happen. Everyone should be proud.

I'm glad that California went Barack and so did most of the U.S. I still have yet too see Obama's speech. I'll have to find it online. But i'm sure it was spectacular. And I don't know if any of you watched it but the Comedy Central station had The Daily Show and the Colbert show performing together. It was really helarious.

Anyways. I think i'll go to La Cumbre shopping mall tomorrow or perhaps later today. Its getting too cold to go swimming. I suppose I still could though....

DM News:
Just in case anyone's wondering... I did switch to the Red Ajah from the Green Ajah. I feel more at home at the Red Ajah and I can't seem to keep up with the Green Ajah's activities. I've also always secretly wanted to be a Red. I'm enjoying being a Red and I really respect all the Red Sisters.

sickness and bad times turn to hope and cheer.

Mon, 20 Oct 2008 19:55:22 GMT

So the fighting stopped for a while. But then it all started again when i had brunch with my dad at ihop. The actual brunch was fine but during it he asked me to write and apology email to Wendy about the apartment. I felt really stupid doing that because i didn't want to apologize for something I wasn't sorry for. Especially since I got sick with bipolar and thats the reason I had to move.

Then Wendy invited me on a trip and I thought it was going to be a super nice trip but she was mean to me a lot. The times that I had fun were when I wasn't with Wendy. I think she was getting her revenge. It was horrid.

I got sick during the trip with bipolar probably because I was under a lot of stress due to Wendy being mean.

Then I felt really uncomfortable and I got a bad cold. I still have the bad cold but I no longer feel uncomfortable. I'm going to stay away from Wendy and tell my dad about it. After all he's the one thats so concerned about my and Wendy's relationship. That should help.

Thats the hope.

And the cheer is that I want to take a class on politics during the Spring semester at CC. Should be lots of fun. So i'll be taking Digital Darkroom1, Career Research, and English 100.

I don't have enough room for politics next semester but thats okay.

Fights And A Dream.

Thu, 18 Sep 2008 20:29:06 GMT

It all started when I moved out of my apartment. I had become manic without realizing it until I got depressed. I then realized that if I can't tell when I'm sick how am I going to live on my own in a lonely apartment. Of course I will gradually learn the signs of when i'm getting sick. It sucks that I can only tell until afterwards at the moment. So I moved to my mom's house.

Of course that started huge ass arguments between my family. Though my brother didn't join in and i'm glad for that.

My dad, and Wendy (my stepmom) were arguing that I should stay in the apartment because I was soo happy while I was there. I wasn't happy. I was extremely lonely and if I seemed happy it was a sorta fake happy that comes from being manic. They even convinced my grandmother who'd I'd been bonding with their side of the story. She believed them for a while but then in the end she gave me her support and in a way a grandmother does. I have to watch out for her though because if I'm arguing with my dad she'll take my dad's side because he's her son. Overall I'm glad to be in touch with her.

Then I decided to take the year off. This started another argument to do with health insurance. Once i'm 19 I can no longer be on my dad's health insurance. I can only be on his health insurance if i'm a full time student. And I won't be if I take the year off. And then I can only be on his insurance until i'm 19.

My stepmom tried to take me off my dad's insurance early which is technically not possible. She did this as a threat. Implying that if I didn't go back to the apartment then they wouldn't have me on my dad's health insurance.

In the meantime my dad is witholding my money that was saved up for me specifically. That is why I need a lawyer. And I'm happy to get a lawyer because it means that problem will be sorted out. It means that the money will be given to an accountant (a nuetral party) where neither my mom or dad or stepmom is in charge of it. Each month I will be given a set amount of money to spend. It will be put into my checking and savings account.

Everything is dying down though i still have to battle with the lawyer's help about the money. I will only be hiring him about this. I meet him on Friday.

During my year off I will try and get the perfect meds with my doctor. Take an adult ed class through SBCC about writing and getting published. I will try and get a job, hopefully at Borders. I want to learn how to drive and other life skills. And if when I get the perfect meds i can fit a trip to Africa that would be great. Its always been one of my dreams to go to Africa.

Out of a Crisis.

Tue, 09 Sep 2008 21:54:35 GMT

I've been so stressed these past couple first weeks of school that I haven't even realized it. People have had to tell me. Once they did I tried to relieve it through reading and excersize. The two things that help me relieve stress.

I was pressured to get an apartment by my dad and his wife Wendy. They did it so well that the idea of it only surfaced a little bit while it was happening. They also offered it as a thing that my mother wouldn't give me. A sort of prize for hanging out with them.

Not only was I pressured to move out and live alone, I was pressured to learn how to drive, to cook, and take care of my stepsister when they weren't around. I still don't know how to drive. I still don't know how to cook. And I still don't know how to change a diaper. All these things were supposed to help me when I lived alone. Even babysitting as a job to earn money. I rebelled by not learning these things.

Thankfully I already knew how to make a few meals and my mom gave me some leftovers for a few nights. I didn't need to know how to drive as I would be taking the buss. I learned the buss system pretty well. I didn't babysit for a job as I had money that was saved up for my college career by my grandparents.

I began to get very lonely at my apartment. Then I began to get sick. One day I was riding the buss and I had a string of hallucinations the entire buss ride. I spiraled downwards from there.

I final realized that I was stressed from people telling me so I did what I do to relieve stress. I began to read. I wouldn't read all the time. I would also get some excersize. Sometimes I would run instead of walk to the buss. This really helped.

I began to realize as I skipped more school because of my illness that had started again because of the stress from all the pressure and school, that I wouldn't be able to do well in school in this environment.

Today when my mom's friend Sheridan picked me up and drove me to my mom's house stopping to get a few things on the way, told me that she didn't think what I was doing was very smart (living on my own at 18 by myself) I told her I agreed with her.

So now i'm in the proccess of moving back into my mom's house.

I know i've said that my mom is controlling but she is also caring and creates a stimulating and healthy environment in her house. I also love her to death.

I also realized that my mom had probably started going to my old therapist and thats good for her because she has some things she needs to sort out.

I made an appointment tomorrow at five with my old therapist because you know, as I was searching for a new one, I didn't find any just as good as her.

I'm going to have my spychiatrist tell my dad and wendy that i'm moving out. I'm afraid that if I do that they will pressure me more.

The college experience

Sat, 06 Sep 2008 18:25:53 GMT

I didn't go to school on Tuesday after labor day because I took my pills to late at night. Then on Wednesday I tried to go to Child Development but nobody was there that I recognized and as I walked by the teacher said "No class on Wednesdays." I was not sure what she meant. She also noticed my medical bracelet as I walked by quickly the last time and said "Oooh pretty medical bracelet." Or something like that.

So I figured that my Child Development teacher was teaching a special class that day and our class wasn't running. That day I had auditions for the dance concert so I called my mom to see if I could just go home and practice dance for the auditions instead of going to school. I called my mom because I didn't want to lie to her about "skipping class" as she would've thought I'd done. So my mom looked up my schedule while we were on the phone and it turned out I had gotten it all wrong. My classes were all messed up because of the way I had memorized them. So my mom told me that that day I had English starting at 12:45 but It was too late into the class for me so I went home to practice dance for the auditions.

I went to the auditions and I wasn't the worst dancer there thankfully. Unfortunately that is all I can be thankful about because I didn't get into the concert. I checked to see if I got in on Thursday and I didn't get in. However I am aloud to ask if I can be a production manager. I did ask and I am currently waiting for a reply over email. After the auditions I took the buss home in the dark.

Thursday I went to Child Development and learned some interesting things. For example, babies can be taught sign language. I talked to the girl next to me and found out in the class that I needed to get the makeup work. So after class I talked to the teacher and got the makeup work. I also told her about my illness and how thats why I might be absent some days. She said that she doesn't have a policy where she drops students because of absences. Thankfully!

After dinner I went over to my dad's and stepmom's and I wished my brother a happy birthday and gave him his present. His present was a card with a check in it. He wants to buy a new guitar.

Friday I got up early at around 6:45. I hung out until about 12:00 and then I ate brunch (and egge with mayonase and bread) at home. Then I went to Aldo's for dessert. After that I went to my dance class and it was really fun. Though now my leggs are really sore. So are my hips. I met a few really cool people there and made three friends.

I finally got the add code before class and added the class before it started.

My Beginning of school.

Sat, 30 Aug 2008 18:50:42 GMT

I've been so busy that I couldn't write about anything yesterday after my last class. And I'll tell you about that in a minute here.

So I'm pretty much all moved in though I do have to buy a few bits a furniture. A coffee table would be a nice start. Then I need a bookshelf and lamps. I do have a furniture magazine coming in a couple weeks. And my grandparents offered to chip in on any one piece of furniture I might really like. Meaning I can go to a fancy furniture store or magazine and pick out one of those items that I need. I think they offered because i've been talking to my grandmother more. She's fun to talk with.

Now that i'm in my new apartment I sent cards to the two neighbors that I met. The cards thanked them for being my new neighbors. Unfortunately I didn't know the name of one of them but aparently he didn't mind because he sent a house welcoming card back. The other lady neighbor came over to thank me and say hi. She also said that if I have any qustions I can just knock on her door.

I'm finding that lately i've been doing a lot of cleaning up after myself. Its kinda fun though.

Well now i'm a college student and i've been going to two classes until recently. My two classes are Child Development and English. I prefer Child Development at the moment, the teacher is a better lecturer. I'm basically in this new class but I have to add it officially and that class is Beginning Modern Dance. There are only 18 students in the class right now and there's still time to add an drop classes. I'm really excited about that class. I think i'm going to try out for the concert on the 3rd. Its so nice to finally have something i'm familiar with on a campus thats so new!

The second day of college I was early so I rested on a lovely lawn of grass nearbye my classroom. There were several others who ended up doing the same thing! It was so relaxing.

I met someone in my English class who I found out has a daughter! I was like wow! Thats pretty unique (we did a introduction thing and part of it you had to say one unique thing about yourself and she said it was that she had a daughter). But then in my Child Development class a lot of other people admitted to being parents which really surprised me. So I just thought that the person in my English class (her name is Roxanne) was just clever enough to fool everyone by saying having a daughter is being unique and having them believe her in that uniqueness.

In Child Development someone I met and talked to was smart enough to gage that I had an illness even without me saying so. I actually felt flattered in a way. She asked me "Did you take your pill this morning? No i'm serious." Then I thought. Well it is a Psychology class. I guess that it being a Psychology class is also what makes me feel safe in that class. Its almost like everyone understands!

So In Beginning Modern Dance the sub teacher (who also teaches at SBCC) told us about a concert and auditions. They said they could use anyone with any range of talent. I really want to try out! I just have to re find out the tryout date and time.

After class i've been hanging out downtown Santa Barbara. I shopped yesterday and the day before I went to the Art Museum. Some pretty great art in there! I usually eat out or pizza at home and save the left overs for another day. So far i've eaten at Chase Restuarant and Bar and Aldo's which is an italian restaurant.

I really hope i'm added to that class soon!

On The Move

Fri, 22 Aug 2008 05:12:29 GMT

I tried to get the college money saved up for me by my grandparents when they were younger. Thats when it all started. I put together a list of monthly expenses for my dad to make it all official. He wasn't satisfied with the amount I would be paying for food. Practically $400 a month. Which is somewhat reasonable. So then he accused my mother of trying to take that money for herself. At first I believed this accusation so I decided to stay over at my dad and stepmom's house to think it over. What ended up happening is that the solution that sorta came to us was that I should get my own apartment. Of course I was super excited. Then as I started searching for an apartment and had time to think. I realized that I loved my mom to matter what and that she probably wasn't trying to steal money. So then on I ignored my dad's accusation. However it might hold as the truth. My mother was against my getting an apartment. Either she wanted me at her house so she could use my money, or she didn't want me to leave because she would miss me. Its most likely the second option. She would be doubly upset because both her daughters are leaving her. Yvette just left for Italy and i'm getting my own apartment. I hope the later of those two options is the truth. Perhaps there is another option I haven't thought of that is the truth. If so I hope that is a good option.

So I stayed at my dad's house just off of Milpas on Eucalyptus hill rd and at the moment I am still staying there. I move into my apartment on Saturday. So far i've watched the Olympics with my dad every night. Each of those past nights i'v had icecream while watching to Olympics. My favorite Olympic events are Gymnastic and Diving. I have babysat my stepsister who's three (Maya) twice and got paid a good amount. I went grocery shopping with Wendy a couple times. I read quit a bit. I'm reading Out Of Africa and the sixth Harry Potter mainly at the moment. Wendy's been teaching me a little cooking. Though she says that I can get a digital camera instead of cooking lessons. Wendy also took me to the DMV and I got my certificate to take the writen test which I still have to study for. I dropped my math class for this year. On Tuesday I voluntered with Wendy at a Jewish Community Center called Shhmmozroom (sp? Its a Jewish Community Center but some people who aren't jewish also go there. Its mainly for older people but the volunteers can be any age. After we volunteered (and i'm going to go back with Wendy) we went to the Obama headquarters. I got a magnet that says "Barack in the day" and a teacher that says Obama 08 (the same shirt that Maya has). I'll probably go back there after the Democratic Convention when Obama picks a vice president because the headquarters will then have new stuff.

Yesterday I said farewell to Sahar and we went swimming. Sahar wants me to visit her when Wendy goes down there for business. I'll have to remember that. Today I said farewell to Kayla. We ate at Sambo's and then I showed her my apartment. She really liked it.

Other than all that stuff I was looking into apartments, getting the apartment, signing an agreement for it, getting the key etc. Today I cleaned the apartment. It took a few hours and I listened to my ipod while I cleaned. It looks much better than before. Before I cleaned I bought cleaning materials which costed almost $300 dollars. I'm glad the landlady is paying me at least $100 dollars to clean the apartment! That was definitely worth all the time I spend cleaning the apartment.

We have already rented a Uhual so that I can move into my apartment. I'm very excited!

Tomorrow I take the buss to CC to get my school stuff and then its off to a movie with Rachael and friends.

I move into the apartment on Saturday!!!

Hawaii Trip!

Sat, 09 Aug 2008 08:41:44 GMT

We sat on the plane awaiting our arrival to Hawaii. All I did was read Oahu Revealed and listened to my ipod. I learned that the rivers here have bacteria. We don't know if we are going in any rivers yet. I also learned that in the olden days of Hawaii, being born from a brother and a sister gives you the highest honers. That sorta freaked me out. I learned about the creature called the Portuguese Man Of War which is like a jelly fish. I learned that they have jelly fish in Hawaii. I also learned a few words but i've forgotten them now... I learned lots of other things from that book during the plane ride because I was reading it a lot.

We arrive at the airport and suddenly people were wearing lays which are flower neck lesses. But it wasn't how I imagined Hawaii where everybody gets lays upon their arrival, only the elite few received them. ;)

Then we went on a drive and found the hotel. Everything in Hawaii is green, brown and tropical (words don't really do Hawaii justice). There are Tiki torches along the sidewalks in some places and I really likes that! Its really very beautiful. Its also very humid out.

The hotel is enormous. Its beautiful as well and it even has a huge fountain. A picture of me in a dress and lays was taken there later. I was hoping to write near the fountain but didn't get around to it.

We ate dinner at a burger restaurant but it had good food. I ordered a bacon cheeseburger. Though I felt like I was going to be sick so I didn't get to eat very much. I had been feeling very dizzy and such before the trip so this is understandable. The dizziness was due to a mix up in meds. But its all sorted out now!

We then went to the beach at night and its wonderfully romantic. And the water feels great. I wish I had some pictures to show just how much one could enjoy it!

Then I got overtired due to time change and we went back to the hotel and fell asleep.

I have noticed that most of the people here are definitely tourists. I was told that the native Hawaiians don't accept visitors and that where they live is very poor. Which is hard to believe in a place so beautiful.

DAY TWO

I have realized that the people here (the tourists i think) stare at you. Or maybe its just me but I don't understand what I'm doing thats weird.

Today we woke up and I went downstairs with my siblings. We got breakfast. I got a cold mocha Hawaiian drink and a Chinamen roll.

Then we toured the hotel. We saw the fountain again. The pools are beautiful. There are two. I couldn't wait to go swimming in them. But today I did something better.

Today I went swimming in the ocean. It is so peaceful. I was amused because i'm scared of the ocean and Hawaii has a peaceful ocean. We went from beach to beach testing each one out which may seem kinda redundant but not in Hawaii.

Then we went for lunch and a little shopping. I bought a pair of rediculus sunglasses for fun and they actually looked okay. The sunglasses broke later unfortunately. I also bought blue flower hair clips. I'll do more shopping later. I want to go back to that place and buy a green ring I saw. I never got to buy that green ring though. And there are lots of other things that you may buy in Hawaii. Oh and my mom bought me a flouting device thats green. Can't wait to use it. I never used the "flouting device" but I will use it at home.

I really want to see the sunset while on the beach. Yes I am starting to love the ocean.

Then we came back to the hotel.

DAY THREE

I think this is the day that I no longer felt like I would get lost. I was on the wrong meds for a while so I was very vulnerable to getting lost for the beginning of this trip. However, that went away after a while by this day as soon as I went downstairs in the elevator by myself. We are on floor 12 and the lobby is on floor 1. So to someone who was recently on the wrong meds it can be quit confusing. ;)

Today we went on a drive. We were all scared of getting motion sickness in the car. We shared two cameras between us. We were trying to find Huanama Bay but when we got there it was closed because there were too many people. We decided to take a drive through the mountains. But before we got to the mountains we stopped at some lookout spots and took lots of pictures. And then we found a beach but it was muggy and housed the creature Portuguese Man of War.

The mountains are different in Hawaii than in most places though in some places it looks pretty similar to here. I imagine some of them might be similar to those in Peru. Most are straight up with little ravine and very green. It was breathtaking.

When we got home I went shopping and bought a wrap around skirt and fake lays. I bought fake lays because they last longer. I have to learn how to use the wrap around. Its green with different patterns. So I did end up getting something green on this trip. ;)

That night I wore a brown dress, a black sweatshirt, and lays. We were going to go to the Cheese Cake Factory but it had a long wait and by long I mean 45 or more (I can't remember). Lots of restaurants here have long waits. But we ate somewhere else and I wasn't that hungry anyways. This day I couldn't decide weather Hawaii was more beautiful in the sun or in the moonlight.

DAY FOUR
I realized today that i've been waking up really early for some reason.
I also realized that days seem rather long.

Today I went downstairs in the morning with my mom to get breakfast early. I got hot chocolate and a Cinamen roll. Yes, I like Cinamen rolls.

I hung out at the pool (and read Oahu Reaveled and wrote stories) and shopped today (I bought a T-shirt and a joke lisence plate thats for my room). I almost got lost while shopping and i found a park while that happened. I think i"m gonna sneak off to there again tomorrow if i have time. Maybe when we get back from our new excursion tomorrow or maybe today. I didn't end up going to that park. I went to another park with my mom instead. I also want to check the information place at the hotel for where else I can go thats in walking distance. I didn't get to do that but I did other more exciting things instead.

I'm excited for tomorrow.

DAY FIVE
On day five we went on a drive to the North Shore where we went snorkeling. Snorkeling was a blast. The water was very clear and I saw some schools of fish. I swam with a couple and scared away a couple schools of fish with my flippers and by swimming through them. The fish were beautiful and Yvette (my sister) even saw a turtle. After a while of snorkeling we had to get out because it was really cold in the deep parts by the surf. There was a current where it was cold too so we had two good reasons to get out.

After we went to the North Shore we went to Turtle Beach and saw some turtles. I liked seeing the turtles.

Then we went back and got dressed up for dinner. We had spectacular Italian near the hotel. It was so good that I wanted to come back but i never did get too.

DAY SIX
On this day consisted of watching T.V and writing. I may have gone down to the pool. This day I was starting to miss my home and all my friends irl as well as DM.

DAY SEVEN
We left the hotel today and hung out at the beach until about five. I dipped my feet and went in for a little bit. We went shopping and had lunch before hand. I bought a black shirt with little decoration but I was happy with my purchase because it looked cool and fit me well. Then we went back to the mall for dinner. We ate at the California Pizza Kitchen (one of my favorite restaurants). On one of our drives between these places, we saw a sunset but I was too tired to take a picture. Then we arrived at the airport, checked everything in and then flew to LA where we would see Eddie Izzard the comdedian. When we got there it was around six in the morning. We took a shuttle to westwood and then lugged our suitcases to my sisters apartment where we stayed until we saw the show.

Summer School

Sun, 13 Jul 2008 20:02:09 GMT

I started taking a summer school course in Photography. The assignments are very interesting , fun, time consuming, and creative. One of my mom's friends who is an English Teacher even said she would turn one of the assignments into a creative writting assignment for her classes. She and I agree that the teacher for my class is very creative. The teacher is also very strict in her grading and in her critiquing. Her name is Jezaira Knight. She is married and has a son. But then again she is nice to you in person. So I've come to realize that you aren't supposed to take any of her feedback personally, if you do you'll be ripped to pieces during the first critiquing session.

The firs time my photograph was critiqued in a negative way I felt horrible and I badmothed the teacher behind her back. Then I started realizing that was the wrong attitude to have about it so I began to take the critiquing sessions as learning sessions. I've learned a lot since and after that I still haven't taken a critique on my photograph personally. I've also realized that she critiques everyone harshly so that the whole class can learn from it. Critiquing is a learning experience, not something terrible.

Then there were the hard couple of worksheets. They were about calculating the ISO, Shutter Speed, and Aperture in an equation. It took me until about the second or third week to figure it out. And that was after the teacher came up to me and explained it to me in person while the other where working on other things. Finally I got 100% on both worksheets. I was very proud of myself.

Then I asked my teacher for my overall grade and in about the third or fourth week I re sieved it. It was a C- and she suggested redoing some assignments, so I did and my grade is not higher. I don't know what it is at the moment though. I had fun redoing the assignments and was happy when I got higher grades.

Then there were the quizes we took each week. The first one I got a good score, the next two I practically failed, and then the recent one I got a good score again. What I'm going to do for the next quizzes is take the first attempt at school and then study and then take the second attempt at home. That is in the hopes that I will get a better score on the second attempt.

We are doing the portfolio assignment and then we will take the final. The portfolio assignment is a set of ten photos and it has to have a theme. My theme is Child Fashion. I got the idea because my mom's friend Sheridan has told us about how her daughter Zoe puts together the cutest outfits. So I had Zoe put together outfits and then I photographed her with different backgrounds. I think she enjoyed it.

Now we are going to print this assignment along with the previous assignment (Photo Story).

Then we will take the final.

Graduation Dinner 1 and 2

Mon, 16 Jun 2008 19:31:35 GMT

After graduation we went home to feed and redress ourselves. Then we drove to Zetune's. Then we got drinks and talked and waited for the guests to arrive. They came rather late and we were already eating the tons of appetizers that were set out on the table. It was arabic food so we had lots of appetizers. We had peta bread and lots of dips to dip it in. It was very good and very filling. I finally ordered my meal even before the guests showed up. It came after they arrived, I think.

It was cold because I was wearing a short gray dress and Lays from the graduation that Wendy gave me. We asked for a fire. There was a fire pit in the middle of one of the two tables. Then finally I had to done my shawl. It was a Spanish shawl that my grandmother on my dad's side gave me.

I made a joke about the non arriving guests just as they arrived, everyone was laughing including them. I could hear their laughter as they walked up the steps. I said something like "Are they coming?" my mom said "whey?" and I said "Because I want to know how many people I have to deal with! Just kidding!"

Then they ordered food and we all talked. I has to pack my food in a box becafuse I was soo full but I did get dessert beore I left. I had dessert with lots of chocolate and whipped cream. It was almost as good as the Arabic food! Then Yvette (my sister) got tired and then I got tired and I asked to leave politely. It took a little while but eventually we did leave. I went home and went to bed. Yvette stayed up with one of the high school friends Rachel who she had met up with at the graduation.

Then on Friday I went to a Mauracan restaurant with my dad and Wendy. She had told me before we went in that there were belly dancers at this restaurant. I thought that was cool because I'd never really seen a belly dancer before. So we ordered drinks and got bread but before we ordered food we had to have water pored on our hands and had a washcloth to wash them. Then I ordered a Lamb I believe it was. It was rather good though after a while it was too sweet. My dad ordered a vegetable dish and Wendy ordered something else. Then we all finished eating and the belly dancer started dancing. It was really cool. It made me want to learn how to belly dance.

They had forgotten my graduation card but I would get it later. And one of my presents was a one time cooking class. I thought that was pretty cool.

Graduation

Sat, 14 Jun 2008 20:05:47 GMT

I went to a yummy breakfast with my friends in the morning. I had a glazed donut. I had no trouble finding my friends there. We watched a sentimental slide show and I signed Bowen's yearbook as well as signing up for bowling later with Leah and Erika as well as Wei. Later Geofrey and Fallen joined us.

So I went to my first graduation practice ever last Wednesday of this week. It wasn't all that fun. It was okay. It was mostly very long and dull. Basically we sat wearing our graduation robes in the sweltering gym on either the East or West side. Come to think of it both the East and West side were not really the actual East or West side. The North and South side were the replacements of the East and West side. The only way we could tell which sides were supposed to be East and West were that there were signs with East or West marked on them. Once most of us sat down, the councilors took roll which is a very long and boring process, something we have to deal with in an everyday classroom. Then some people straggled in late, some even after the vice principal had started talking. The person to arive the latest was Marchall who was in my Econ class.

The vice principal began talking about how we would be in alphabetical order during the ceremony. Then she talked the rest of the time as if she had to prove she was very strict and so was the administration. It was very annoying.

Then we left. I got a ride with Racheal home. I went home and then walked to the mall to get a blenders. I got a mocha to keep me up for the bowling. I went to bowling and it was really fun. I only had one strike though. Kayla signed my yearbook at the bowling alley. Her signature made me laugh. Then we left and I got a sprite while waiting for my mom at a restaurant near bye the bowling alley. Then I went home and read harry potter. :)

The next day I wolk up early at around eight. We thought I was going to be late for the practice but I wasn't. I got dropped off and I realized that I should be wearing my robe so I put if on over the fancy dress I was wearing for that day (the practice and the ceremony). I followed people in robes to the football feild where we all lined up to go to the seats in the stadium. We all got arranged so that we looked like an O8 from above. Then pictures were taken, I was siting next to Emily and Sarah.

Then we all went down to the seats on the football field and sat on the real East or West side in the seat we were assigned. We went through the graduation practice; we walked and the vice principal told us what to do on certain cue. Everybody even went up on the stage, shook hands with people, and got their diplomas, after which they walked across and off the stage. During the practice the diplomas weren't really there. After a bit of this we started switching seats to sit with our friends. I sat with Racheal for a while and said hi to Emily. They even brought us water to drink and let us take off our robes. Finally we were aloud to go home. Some people left early but they probably had permission. After everyone went across the stage we were all aloud to go home. I called my mom and she came to pick me up. Jenn was going to sign my yearbook during the wait but she had to leave and by the time she was ready I had to leave too.

My mom picked me up and I took off my robe (I had my dress under). Then my mom drove me to get blenders at the mall close to my house. She gave me money to give to Andrew as well because he was at the mall with a couple friends trying to get lunch. So I found Andrew at Kahuna Grill and gave him his twenty dollars. Then I took my five and bought myself a mocha blenders. I needed the caffeine. Then my mom took me home and I finished my blenders. Then I changed before because I didn't want to get my dress dirty with blenders. Then I hung out and played on the computer until I realized I had just enough time to take a shower. So I took a shower. I was just about done when my mom bangs the downstairs door open and shouts my name. Apparently I was going to be late. So I hurry myself to get ready and I brush my hair in the car. It was still soaking wet when I got there. We had to ask someone for directions and they told us were the drop off was. So my mom dropped me off and I walked down to the lower soccer field.
Thankfully I wasn't late. I saw Racheal and we hung out until we found everybody else and then we got into our spots for the ceremony.

It took about an hour for the ceremony to start. While I was walking I saw Mrs. Hirsch but that was about all of the people I saw that I knew. My family was still there though. The highlight of the ceremony was when my sister surprised me afterwards. Though I must admit, the ceremony itself was not bad. I didn't cry though.

End Of High School

Tue, 10 Jun 2008 19:27:29 GMT

I passed all my classes. I don't know what grade I had in Econ but it was good enough to pass! I hope my final (test) grade highered my normal grade! I don't know my final grade in most of my classes. But I know I have a B+ in English and an A in study hall.

I got a certificate of merit for my business accounting class. It says I could be hired to do all the things I was taught in class. *winces* Most of the time I was just playing on the computer. LOL. Still it made me feel good to receive that certificate. I must have done enough of the real work to earn it.

Most of all the end of high school was painful and not because I would miss it. It was painful because I was sick of high school by that point. Actually I was sick of high school much early on but it escalated at the end and made it worse. However, I will miss those that I won't be in touch with over summer. And then the others when I start school in the fall.

I got signatures of most of my close friends. I still need some of them to sign at the senior activities. Thankfully I have a bag that is big enough to fit my yearbook.

I gave thank you cards to all my teachers and my mom is insisting on giving all of them presents. I think that is a little bit much. Just cards is usually enough but I'm not going to argue her kindness too much.

I am very very excited to be a high school graduate and I'm looking forward to graduation and beyond.

Tests

Sat, 31 May 2008 22:17:28 GMT

Last week was basically finals week for me. It was very stressful. I took my English and Econ finals. The two finals that mattered. My two core classes. I still have to take my business accounting final but all that is is an interview as if your trying to get a job. Shouldn't be too hard eh?

I studied for two days for both the English and Econ finals. I made flashcards for both finals because flashcards help me memorize vocabulary. I realized once I took the English final that knowing the vocabulary really helps you understand the test. So I went on to make flashcards for Econ on Thursday after my English final. The Econ final was on Friday. Unfortunately I didn't have time to study the Econ flashcards on Thursday. I took the day off on the day of the Econ final to study more for it and it really helped on the test!

If I fail the English final I will get a B in the class but if I fail the Econ final I will get a D. I think I will pass both classes but one class I won't have a very impressive grade.

There are six more school days left until senior checkout day! Eight more days!

If I pass or if I don't pass, either way this school year is over and thats something to celebrate!

I find out about my Econ final next week. I'm not sure when I find out about my English final.

There will be senior events and i'm only going to the Breakfast and Bowling after senior checkout day! Should be fun!

I am going to have a graduation dinner right after graduation with my mom and friends. Then on Friday the day after, I will have another graduation dinner with my dad and Wendy. My dad and Wendy say they have graduation gifts for me. I wonder what they are! *dances*

Prom

Mon, 19 May 2008 19:22:21 GMT

So the day of prom was my mother's birthday. She didn't want to drive me around to get my haircut so my mom had her best friend Sheridan drive me. I went to de-cut and I had my hair highlighted and then cut a few inches a layered. I got my hair done first and at the hair salon I saw three people that I knew. I saw Tina Ho, Bekka Kim, and Claire-Gorden-Harper. I didn't get to see any of their hairdos until prom.

At first my highlights looked too blonde and I thought noone would recognize me, then I paid for my haircut and went on my way and gradually it got darker and more recognizable.

After I got my haircut I went to get my mom's present. For mother's day I had gotten her a few nice martini glasses so for her birthday I wanted to get her a margarita shaker. She likes margaritas. I hadn't gotten her present earlier because I didn't know where to get those kinda things, but Sheridan did and she took me to a store called Potterybarn or something. So I got her a standard shaker. I didn't have enough money to get her a mixing book as well though that would've been cool. She'll have to learn the mixes the hard way.

Then I needed to get a strapless bra. By the time we went to the Potterybarn we were in La Cumbre and we thought we could go to Victoria Secret for the bra but its not there anymore so we went to Sears. We found the perfect bra immediately and bought it. Unfortunately Sheridan didn't find her size bra and therefore didn't get a new one.

We had brought my dress to fit it with the bra but Sheridan had done a chore at her work while I got my haircut so she left the car with my dress at her work. Therefore after we got my bra we went back to get the car and then we also got blenders because it was too hot out. I got a mocha to keep me awake at the dance. We got cards for my mom while we got blenders because there was a card shop right next to blenders.

I paid for my mom's present and for the bra. It turns out I went in debt until my mom gave me the allowance for the year and put it in my account. She told me I will get a fee for that. But it was worth it. I feel better about things when I pay for them myself. Like I earned it.

Prom was great. All my friends looked fabulous. I got tired and couldn't find anyone I wanted to dance with in the end. So I left.

So all I have left for school is Finals, Senior activities, and Graduation.

College and stories

Fri, 02 May 2008 04:12:28 GMT

So I am officially going to take a photography class at the local community college this summer. Along with trying to get a job at the downtown library and perhaps going to Hawaii. Thats what my summer is looking like at the moment. I had hoped at first to do something dramatic this coming summer, like living on my own in Spain for a few weeks. That would've been cool but apparently its "not aloud at my age".

I went to a councilor who works for the college I will be going to next year and we looked at classes. We mainly figured out what level of English and Math I'm in (from assessment tests) and what thats means at the college. In Math I am in what they call Math Four which is really Pre-Algebra. For English I am in English 100 which is right below college English. It was realized that I will have to take an English and Math course in the Fall. Then I have one more class that I can take. I wanted to take Journalism but I was told you don't work towards your major until after your second or third year. Also I didn't have the English requirements for it. So I'm choosing to take Marine Biology. I heard there is a class on it tought by a really good and enthusiastic teacher. My mom's friend took a marine biology class there once and really enjoyed it. I am also interested in marine biology itself.

The photography class in the summer will be all digital and thankfully they will lend out digital cameras.

So I have been writing a short story. Its a ghost story and I just finished it. It just needs to be typed up and edited. Speaking of stories, my English teacher is currently reading the last story I wrote. So far she's said its well written. We'll see what she says when she's finished. lol. A neighborhood friend of mine is also reading it and he's also into writing so it'll be interesting to find out what he thinks of it. My mom's boyfriend who is trying to publish a novel himself is also supposed to be reading it.

My mom is out of town today until Friday evening. I didn't end up going to school today but I have a ride to school tomorrow even though its early in the morning. I have a quiz in English tomorrow and its important to go anyways because its school.

Traveling

Tue, 08 Apr 2008 02:13:09 GMT

So I went to San Francisco. It was wonderful. San Francisco is full of streets that go up and down. San Fran (I might say) is full of hills. It is a city of hills and cold weather. However there are fun things to do there and interesting sites to see.

Day one in San Francisco I met up with my uncle Martin at his apartment and met his roommate, Jher. She's older than Martin and probably around my mom's age. She used to be married to one of the Rolling Stones and she has a good sense of humor. She likes to make jokes.

After hanging out at his apartment and chatting, we went to a Japanese restaurant. It is one that is a favorite of Martins. The food was pretty good though I didn't like how they made the Philadelphia rolls. The tempura was yummy and so was the miso soup.

Then we went to see the movie StopLoss... though it was a powerful message I didn't like how in the end the guy did go back to Iraq. It was disappointing.

Then we went back to the hotel. On the way we got ice cream.

The next morning we met up with Martin in the morning and then we went to the De Young museum. I even go to take some flash photographs before one of the staff members told me not to use flash. There were some pretty amazing sculptures and nice paintings. There were also a couple ornate chests and one fancily decorated ceiling. I bought a magnet box with thank you cards in it. They were all painted with the blurry lily Monet painting.

Then we had lunch at a bagel shop.

After that we went back to the hotel because my dad wanted to watch the UCLA vs Memphis college basketball game. While he was watching I did some writing and watched OOTP (The Fifth Harry Potter).

Then we went to a Bill Conelley stand up comedy show. He was pretty funny though he did swear a lot. And I got tired near the end.

Then we went to Martin's house. I had some ice cream and we chatted.

Then we went back to the hotel and went to sleep.

Then next day we woke up and checked out of the hotel. Me met up with Martin but he was going on a hike with a friend that day so we went to the Golden Gate Bridge alone. We walked almost half way across. It was really windy and I had to put my glasses in my purse so they wouldn't blow away. I bought a miniature sculpture of the Golden Gate Bridge that is really painted gold.

Then we came back and met up with Martin and had a brunch of bagels.

Martin called Daniel (my other uncle) to see if we could visit on our way out of SF. They said we could but Tessa wouldn't be able to be there. So we checked out of the hotel and visited them. We chatted at their house and then all went for ice cream. My cousins said they want to come visit us in Santa Barbara. Then we left San Francisco.

The entire trip was rather fun.